Petter
kazmolog
Regjistruar: 20/07/2009
Vendbanimi: New York
Mesazhe: 2058
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Po postoj dhe un disa qe gjeta ne google - jane ne anglisht , sorry
Differences Between Man and Women
Names:
If Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara.
If John, Brad, Tony and Daniel go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bruno, Scrappy, Peanut-Head and Godzilla.
Eating Out:
When the bill arrives, John, Brad, Tony and Daniel will each throw in $20, even though the total is only $34.25. None of them will have any smaller bills and none will admit they want change back.
When Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
Money:
A man will pay $10 for a $5 item he needs.
A woman will pay $5 for a $10 item that she doesn't need, because it's on sale.
Bathrooms:
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, razor, shaving cream, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Motel 6.
The average number of items in a woman's bathroom is 328. The average man would not be able to identify most of them.
Arguments:
Women always have the last word in an argument. Anything a man adds after that is the beginning of a new argument.
Cats:
Women love cats.
Men may say they love cats, but when women are not looking, will men kick cats.
Future:
A woman worries about the future -- until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future -- until he gets a wife.
Success:
A successful man is one who makes more money than can be spent by his wife.
A successful woman is one who can find that a man.
Marriage:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
Dressing Up:
A woman will dress up when she goes shopping, empties the garbage, answers the phone, waters the plants, gets the mail and reads a book.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
Natural:
Men wake up looking as good as when they went to bed.
Women will somehow deteriorate during the night.
Children:
A woman knows all about her children. She knows about their best friends, romances, secret hopes and dreams, favorite foods, fears and dental appointments.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
Thought for the Day:
Married men should forget their mistakes. There is no need for two people to remember the same thing.
Why Men Are Happier?
Men can play with toys all their life.
Men can wear shorts no matter what their legs look like.
Men have one wallet and one pair of shoes which are good for every season.
Men can choose whether or not to grow a mustache.
Men can "do" their fingernails with a pocket knife.
Men's bellies usually hide their large hips.
Chocolate is just another snack.
The whole garage belongs to them.
Weddings take care of themselves.
Men's last name never changes.
Everything on a man's face stays its original color.
Men only have to shave their faces and necks.
Men can keep the same hairstyle for years, even decades.
Men can do their Christmas shopping for 25 relative on Christmas Eve in 25 minutes.
For men, wrinkles add character.
Men can go on a week's vacation and pack only one suitcase.
Men's new shoes don't cause blisters, or cut or mangle their feet.
Men don't have to stop and think which way to turn a screw.
Men have one mood all the time.
A wedding dress cost $5000. A tuxedo rental - 100 bucks
Men can open all their own jars.
__________________
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
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